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Adoption: Friendships Forged through a Common Dream

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Adoption: Friendships Forged through a Common Dream

By Edi Sowers


I've had an incredible realization the last several months. I have realized the power of sharing, authenticity, and unity through a common bond - a shared experience.

As a result of a "virtual" community of women from across the globe, I am blessed beyond belief. This community is made up of women who are at one stage or another of the unique, life-changing experience of becoming mothers through God's miracle of adoption.

Who would have imagined years ago when email and the internet were just fledgling forms of communication, that real, fulfilling, heart-warming friendships could develop between people who have never met face to face.

It happens because we share a desire, a dream, a frustration - and a common joy that only God could give!

I've taken apart the word "friend", and share some realizations that have come as gifts from my new "adoption" friends.

F - fellowship. There's nothing like the company of girlfriends. God created us for fellowship, and friends are such a gift. We're made to depend on one another and hold each other up when things get tough. I am amazed at the fellowship that results when I am able to connect with friends who share the unity of God's Holy Spirit.

R - real. You know a real friend when she can tell you the truth about something, and do it in a way that actually makes you feel better about yourself! You know you have a good girlfriend when her feedback about a less-than-flattering outfit (or a bad haircut) steers you away from the bad - and towards the better. And when it comes to the most important things - how we relate to our husbands, our kids, and others - we can trust our friend to give us truth, sprinkled with compassion.

I - inquisitive. Do you feel like you are always the one listening to others - asking questions about them and their problems, showing concern and interest? Well, a friend is inquisitive about YOU - and gives you time and space to talk, to be heard, and to have a safe place to share what's in your heart and on your mind.

E - encouraging. We MUST have at least one friend who always leaves us feeling better because we were with them. An encourager who pours courage into you - and helps you lift your head up and move on even when things are tough. Who is that person in your life? Have you told them how much they mean to you? Are you that person for someone else?

N - new. There is such energy and life in the development of a new friend...someone to learn about, to share yourself with, to laugh and cry with. Even old friendships can become new again because of shared experiences, growth, and changing circumstances. May we never become too busy or self-involved that we do not have time to invest something new in our friendships.

D - dependable. A friend is a person you can call anytime, day or night, and know without a doubt that they'll understand you, listen to you, love you, and take your hand to walk through your trials and your joys.

I am so thankful for each one of my new friends - women who have, in many ways, shown me more about who I am than I ever would have learned on my own. Women who give self-lessly of themselves to people that could be considered "total strangers." Friends who have given me courage, hope, and joy through one of the most profound experiences of life.

May we all be that friend to another.

Visit Christian Adoption Moms to sign up for "Moments for Mom" and receive Edi Sowers' f*r*e*e* weekly articles. Edi and her husband are currently waiting to travel to China to get their daughter from Sichuan province.

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