Comments on: If your giving your babies up for open adoption, how is the hospital stay? Do they get to stay with you?

By: You're WAY to serious

You're WAY to serious — Fri, 09 Oct 2009 23:55:38 +0000

Adoption Feedback: Why do you care if you are giving the child away anyway. I never understood these question. And YOURr baby til you sign them away? The child is never YOUR baby if you given them away

By: KELYY S

KELYY S — Thu, 08 Oct 2009 23:18:01 +0000

Adoption Feedback: I did an open adoption….I got to see her every day that I was there. I spent time with her and the adoptive parents….I said my goodbyes to her alone and it was an experience that I will never forget. To give your child a life to live happily is one of the most loving things a human soul can do. That is what you call unconditional love!!! That is a “MOTHER”!! You tell your doctor what you want this delivery and hospital stay to be like and they have to allow that…… don’t take the bad remarks you get …. you have true heart….your child will love you for that!!

By: Carly Sue

Carly Sue — Wed, 07 Oct 2009 16:50:48 +0000

Adoption Feedback: I was able to have as much interaction as I wanted you have that right I’m sure the family will understand after all you’ve carried this little kicking spinning thing for a while and would only want to see it and let it know that you love it too. I think it’s good because if you don’t you may question yourself later for not interacting with your baby. It’s a hard time emotionally and on top of it your hormone level will have you so emotional on top of everything. It is still your birthing plan so make it with your OB, the baby isn’t officially theirs until the judge says so and your sign the paper but I am sure they would understand.

By: Ladydi

Ladydi — Sun, 04 Oct 2009 06:46:47 +0000

Adoption Feedback: With me, I made it clear I didnt want to see the baby and I wanted to be separted from other birthing moms. They let me do that. However, after a few hours of having the baby, I decided to hold him. I kept him in my room for a few hours then back to the nursery. The next day I brought him in my room to say good bye. The adoptive parents came after that to pick him up. This was all MY wishes. If you choose for them to be there the whole time, then do so. You need to remember: That is YOUR baby until you sign away your rights. You should do whats best for you when it comes to seeing the baby etc…

By: lahdh4

lahdh4 — Thu, 01 Oct 2009 08:09:09 +0000

Adoption Feedback: You are still mom and can do what you want. If you wish for your child to be in the room with you the whole time you are there then do it.
The pap’s can visit, but you are MOM. Don’t let anyone tell you differently.

By: lux

lux — Tue, 29 Sep 2009 13:56:12 +0000

Adoption Feedback: Honey, babies are such a precious gift. Keep your baby. There are soo many agencies that will help you. Your question makes it sound like you aren’t sure, and being a mom myself, I know the bond that is formed over those 9 months. Now, I’m not anti-adoption. My husband and I plan on adopting in the future. But, don’t make a decision because you feel you have to. Do it because you want to. And if you want a few days, or a lifetime with your baby, then it’s your choice! Good luck.

By: Adopted Jane

Adopted Jane — Sat, 26 Sep 2009 10:52:09 +0000

Adoption Feedback: I agree with beegirl, Why don’t you keep your baby. keeping your baby with you will be so much more in the best interest of the child than open adoption will ever be..

Trust me you will not regret it

By: cagney

cagney — Fri, 25 Sep 2009 07:12:06 +0000

Adoption Feedback: from the adoptive parent side, when our daughter was born she was with her biological mother all she wanted. we were just guests that were allowed to be there. and it was the mother’s choice wether or not we could see the baby.

the rules of the hospital where our daughter was born was that the woman that gave birth had all the say and all the rights to the baby. and you will. they shouldn’t keep you from your baby. and even after papers were signed it was the mother that still had the right to see her baby and spend all the time she wanted with her.

the hospital was kind enough to let hubby and i have our own room though. and it ended up with all of us hanging out for the night and bonding with one another and this beautiful child in the same room anyway, but that was the mother’s choice. i hope your open adoption works as well as ours has, we honor our end with visits and phone calls and letters. we respected that she could decide to parent and that she have all the time she wanted with her daughter. and the hospital was of the same thinking. and we were glad for that.

i would call the hospital where you are to deliver and ask their policy. legally though i believe that you are the one that has all the say in who and when they visit.

By: wolfmuslim

wolfmuslim — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 21:35:37 +0000

Adoption Feedback: I think the state takes the baby and gives it to the adoptive parents right after birth. You may get a few minutes to say goodbye but then there are some states that don’t let the birth mother see her kid if she places it up for adoption. Check with your state.

By: Problem Child

Problem Child — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 08:38:29 +0000

Adoption Feedback: I work maternity and have seen many mothers having their babies stay with them after they give birth. Your baby is yours until you sign papers relinquishing your rights. So, you can do whatever you want with your baby.
I know that in some places they still have the antiquated notion that you must be separated from your baby if you’re giving it up for adoption. If anyone tries to take your baby away (like for example the nursing staff) they are dead wrong and you DO have the right to have your baby with you every minute if you want and to even breastfeed him or her. I’ve seen mothers doing this for the first few days, and I think it’s really nice.
You also have no obligation to have the adopting parents in the room during the birth or at any point afterwards if you don’t want them to be there. You are the mother of your baby and you run the show. Don’t ever forget that.

ETA: Took the mirrors out of the room?! Jeez! Where is that I wonder? As I said, I know that practices are still very old-fashioned some places, so be very clear that you have the right to do whatever you want. In my area, we only move mothers to another floor for recovery if their baby has DIED…not for moms giving their baby for adoption. That is so sad.