Comments on: What should my adopted daughter call her birth mother?

By: xnicole1224x

xnicole1224x — Sun, 13 Sep 2009 03:45:43 +0000

Adoption Feedback: i think that you should let her call her by her first name. my sister is adopted and whenever her mom comes up in a conversation she butts in and says “oh my mom this and that” i think it really hurts my mom. so calling her by her first name would be appropriate. also, i think its great your keeping in touch with the parents.

By: lady_bella

lady_bella — Fri, 11 Sep 2009 10:11:40 +0000

Adoption Feedback: Say her birth mother’s name is “Sarah”, she can call her, “Mama Sarah”. You may want to talk about this with the birth mother as well. I think it’s absolutely wonderful that you are keeping in touch with the birth parents. I do believe you will be moreso her mom since you are raising her. And I do believe that the little girl needs to know of her birth mother. This is a difficult question. I can certainly understand your dilema here.

How about, “mom mom” for her birth mother, and “mama” for you? I’m not fond of being called, ‘mother’, as it sounds so formal.

I hope this helps.

By: PattyAnn

PattyAnn — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 07:54:44 +0000

Adoption Feedback: Our friend’s child calls her biological mother “Mama Lois.” Of course Lois is her first name. She calls her adoptive mother Mama.
‘Natural mother’ and ‘Natural child’ are not good terms. One time our pastor used that term on Mother’s Day, and my grandkids (adopted at 4 months) couldn’t figure out why they weren’t natural children.

By: Wilde Child

Wilde Child — Fri, 04 Sep 2009 22:22:13 +0000

Adoption Feedback: Let’s say your daughter’s biological mother is named Betty

Why not have her be called “Momma B” or something of the like?

This way it will differentiate between the two of you, without placing any sort of special title to her biological mother.

By: speakimpeccably

speakimpeccably — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 05:46:37 +0000

Adoption Feedback: Think about this. Should she call her “Real Mommy” and call you “Adopted Mommy”? Of course not. The biological mother is the egg donor; the woman raising her is the mother. Call her by her given name but add Miss in front of it, i.e. Miss Ruby, or simply call her by her married name, Mrs. Whatever.

By: keen2ts

keen2ts — Sat, 29 Aug 2009 23:33:47 +0000

Adoption Feedback: let her decide what to call her when she gets older. you don’t want to start confusing child too early.

By: j c

j c — Fri, 28 Aug 2009 09:55:40 +0000

Adoption Feedback: While I hope not, you may come to regret maintaining a regular relationship with the birth parents & especially the mother. I would suggest she call her by their names, like Ann & Joe, or whatever it is, or even with a bit more formality, Miss Ann or Mr. Joe, or example – I don’t think I’d go down the road of Mama Ann & Daddy Joe, or Aunt Ann & Uncle Joe, or anything like that. A child is a child & when older, knowing they have other parents, they can play that like a fiddle when they want to – be prepared for the day when your baby girl is older & gets angry & tells you she’s going to go live with her REAL mother, because that will likely happen & you’ll need to be prepared to nip that. Also if the birth parents will be part of your lives, you need to have a good understanding with them, that if that happens, they are NOT to encourage it, even if they agree with her & disagree with you. Guess my response turned in more than a name for birth mom & birth dad, but just because you have legal papers making you the parents, doesn’t mean they can’t have a lot of influence over your child.

By: amanda r

amanda r — Fri, 28 Aug 2009 00:15:01 +0000

Adoption Feedback: First congrats on being a mother! I would let your daughter call her by her first name i don’t think its rude in any way it is what her friends, family, coworkers etc. call her. You are her mother now because she gave up those rights.

By: shams al nahar

shams al nahar — Thu, 27 Aug 2009 10:39:05 +0000

Adoption Feedback: Man that’s a hard one.

mother(her name),and you mommy

By: julia

julia — Tue, 25 Aug 2009 14:11:34 +0000

Adoption Feedback: let her call her whatever she wants to call her